The Tombstone Exercise

Back in 2008 when I took a class taught by Dr. J. Robert Clinton at Fuller Theological Seminary one of the first exercises we did was called the Tombstone Exercise.

“Pretend that you are going to write the epitaph that will be on your tombstone (even if tombstones are not used in your culture). What short summary statement would capture what you want to be remembered for? Write out your epitaph.”

Although this may sound morbid it actually isn’t.  Dr. Clinton borrows a quote from Stephen Covey, the author of The Seven Habits of High Effective People, “Keep the end in mind.”  The Tombstone Exercise forces you to think about the way you are living now in light of the end of your life.

I’ve been thinking about this a lot in light of the recent passing of my parents – my mom died in 2010 and my dad in 2011.  Life is fragile and someone’s passing can come quickly and suddenly.  At the end of my life what would I want written on my tombstone?  What will people remember?

There have been two values that have guided me over the past decade which I believe will carry until I pass.  The first is to make God famous.  This is the modern-day translation of the term “glorifying God.”  This is taken from 1Cor. 10:31, “Whether then you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”  To glorify God means to spread His splendor, to broadcast His beauty, to radiate His reputation, to increase His influence.  I like to use the term: to make God famous.

When I went to a Cat & Dog Theology seminar in 2003, it caused a paradigm shift in my thinking and I went from man-centered Christianity to God-centered Christianity, or as the instructor, Jim Thurber, put it: from ME-ology to THE-ology.  Up until that point, I thought I was living a good Christian life until I realized that I had been living a me-centered Christianity where I believed life was all about me.  But a number of verses changed my thinking: John 12:27-28 and Rom. 15:9.  From that point on I started living a life that would make God famous rather than me.

The second value was the idea of finishing well.  Dr. Clinton says that only one out of three Christian leaders finish well based upon his character studies of the Bible.  That means that two out of three don’t.  This saddens me.  That means 66% of Christian leaders, at the end of their lives, cannot say that they stayed steadfast with the Lord and accomplished God’s purposes in their generation (Acts 13:36).  Clinton also found six reasons leaders don’t finish well, six keys to finishing well, and five enhancements to finishing well (see earlier Notes series titled “Finishing Well”).

One of my life goals is to not only finish well but to help others finish well.  I believe when leaders finish well it glorifies God.  I want my children and grandchildren along with those I mentor and lead to be able to see someone finishing well which will hopefully inspire them to finish well.

The Lord has given me this life, not so I can spend it on myself, my wants, and my desires and finish poorly, but to align with the Lord, advance what He is doing, and allow the next generation to make God famous in ways I never thought possible.

At the end of my life I want my tombstone to read, “HE FINISHED WELL AND MADE GOD FAMOUS.”  With this in mind, I now work backwards to see how I am living this.  If I were to die today could it be said that I finished well?  Could it be said that I glorified God?  If not, what course corrections do I need to make now?

At the end of your life, what do you want to be written on your tombstone?

Questions to think about:
If you were to pass away today, what would people remember about you?  Is that what you want them to really remember?
What legacy are you leaving behind?
What course corrections do you need to make now to ensure a good finish?

© Gary Lau 2011
All rights reserved.  This article may not be distributed, forwarded or duplicated without prior permission from the author.

 


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