Over the years, one of the more difficult things I’ve seen Christians go through is the inability to say no when they are invited to participate in a ministry. I’ve seen it time and time again over my 30 years as a Christian. The head of the children’s or youth ministry desperately needs help. There’s not enough people to help set up the church on Sunday morning. The edification pastor is looking for small group leaders. Volunteers are needed for the upcoming outreach. So many ministries, so little time. And people have a hard time saying no.
There are a number of reasons for this.
The cause is worthy. Ministry is a worthy endeavor because any ministry brings people closer to Jesus, whether through evangelism, edification, or both. Being part of the nursery ministry so a single mom can worship; driving teenagers around so they can go to a youth meeting; arriving early to church to set up the greeting area; preparing for a small group dinner on a Wednesday night – all worthy of anyone’s time and effort.
The desire to help. People have a natural desire to help. Here in Hawaii everyone considers everyone else family, even if they aren’t related. This is ingrained in the culture as early as childhood (or as we like to say “small kid time”). Thus when one family member needs a hand, everyone pitches in. This is easily carried over to the church. When a ministry needs some help, and someone asks, it’s very difficult to say no because it’s like saying no to family.
The desire not to offend. In certain cultures, saying no when asked is akin to offending someone. In Mediterranean cultures, declining an invitation to a meal is offensive. In Asian cultures, not obeying your elders is wrong. Therefore declining an invitation to participate in a ministry could be thought of as wrong or offensive by the one who is asking.
One can see how saying no to help in a ministry can be difficult.
But I’m reminded of two people who did not do all the ministry before them. The first is Jesus. He comes to the pool of Bethesda. There are many who are sick, blind, lame and withered (John 5:3). They are waiting for an angel of the Lord to come and stir the waters, for whoever steps into the water first is healed from his ailment. Jesus comes along and finds a man with a 38-year old ailment and heals him. He is the only one Jesus heals. There is no account that he healed the others, even though there were those who could have used His touch. Jesus put a limit to the ministry He did.
The second example is Paul. He is on his second missionary journey and wants to go into Asia Minor to speak the Word. But he is forbidden to do so by the Holy Spirit (Acts 16:6). He continues on and desires to go into Bithynia but again the Holy Spirit prevents him from doing so (16:7). Didn’t the people in Asia Minor and Bithynia need to hear the good news about Jesus? Weren’t there people who needed to be healed? Didn’t a church need to be established? Yes to all those questions. But there was a limit to what the Spirit allowed Paul to do.
Therefore, here’s a simple guideline I’ve used when it comes to deciding whether to say yes or no to a ministry: do only what the Holy Spirit tells you to do. It’s simple but also a bit difficult, because it will take effort on your part. It will take effort to discipline yourself on a daily basis to commune with the Lord. The more time you spend with the Lord, the more you recognize His voice. When you recognize His voice, you can discern whether to say yes or no to a ministry.
There is also a Catch-22 that is sometimes involved. You could be doing so much ministry you don’t have enough time to spend with the Lord. That’s when a ministry justification happens in the heart: “Lord, I’m doing ministry for You which is why I don’t have any time to spend with you.” But therein lies one of the keys to doing ministry with the right heart. We don’t do ministry FOR the Lord, we do ministry WITH the Lord. Any ministry you participate in not only builds His Kingdom, but also builds your relationship with Him. Thus, if you have a difficult time sensing the personal presence of the Lord in the midst of doing ministry, you may be doing too much ministry.
Sometimes we don’t have good leaders finishing well because they are doing too much ministry.
Questions to Think About:
Are you doing ministry FOR God, or WITH God?
Do you have a difficult time saying no when someone asks for help with a ministry? Why is that?
© Gary Lau 2013
All rights reserved. This article may not be distributed, forwarded or duplicated without prior permission from the author.
Leave a Reply